It's also led me to be perhaps more candid than I'm comfortable with (telling him I miss him) or even affected on a physiological level (I don't sleep as well when I don't hear from him). My sense of loyalty to him (whether deserved or not) has led me to turn down what could otherwise be really fruitful relationship opportunities. Some of the things that I've done since we've been talking worry me in the grand scheme of things. I've had a lot to think about regarding why I should or should not be with him. He might be coming to see me in mid-February but neither of us know for sure. Gray and I are obviously taking it slowly, just talking and such. Last semester was a huge trial, and I don't want to go through that again. I've had to grow a lot to even get to this point, and it wasn't easy. I need to get to a point where I'm comfortable with him and us, and he needs to trust himself not to hurt me by knowing what he wants. As it stands, we're working on "growing our friendship." It's cliche, yes, but it's what we both need. We're very supportive of each other's ambitions and recognize that those are time sensitive issues that need more immediate attention than whatever we are. Everyday we text, talk, email, or skype usually about the trivial things but sometimes about more serious things. Neither of us knows what we necessarily want, but we know that we are important to each other. Gray and I are talking, and have been talking since Christmas. However, there's one other thing in my life that merits discussion. I've been having some difficulty retaining the things that I'm reading too, but as the semester goes on I've been getting better with that. Not to mention the fact that I'm sick and am taking one more class than I did last semester. I have a TON of interviews lined up for both NODA and ACUHO-I internship programs, which is really exciting but making it increasingly difficult to keep current with my schoolwork. All of those things are occurring and I'm really enjoying my life. So most of my last post was about my life and all the great things that are going on.